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On Angels and Messengers

Saturday, October 10, 2020

50 YEARS TODAY

With a 13-year-old 6-cylinder Jeep, I have just pulled one cat in a two-ton trailer 2800 miles I will reach Gig Harbor quite soon -- to get a high-tech kinetic orthotic for my leg. 

My life may suddenly change as it did 50 years ago on this day when I took a waif for a wife. 

On that day, I walked down the aisle with a cane in my left hand and my bride on my right.  The cane is no longer sufficient.

I surrendered my independence that day.  I got it back when I lost her damn near 43 years later.  

I miss her dearly, though I never feel lonely.  I have discovered how to feel complete without a partner. 

I have also learned to be comfortable with uncertainty.  I made this journey on faith that I'll somehow be able to pay for it.  She never learned how to live like that.  

More recently, I learned this paradoxical truth:  Independence is not something you can achieve all by yourself.  

In her honor, I hope to burn that old cane in the woodstove I put in the cabin where I intend to live free til I die like they do in New Hampshire. Please help me if haven't already. It you don't know how, just ask. Then come to the cane-burning party sometime in May.


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