Winners and Losers

A WINNER is someone
who daily takes chances,
learns from their losses,
and gives their winnings away.

A LOSER is someone
who never takes chances
because they fear losing
something they've already lost.

Part I. CRITICISM FROM OTHERS

From CRITICISM,  A TRILOGY


FOREWORD

My head wrote this poem to buoy up my heart 
     when it was low in the water. 
It worked -- so now we offer this verse to you, 
     with sincere hope that you’ll find something useful. 
If you don’t like what it says or how it’s said, 
     we really don’t give a dust bunny.

It’s Not About You

Do not take to heart
     any judgmental comments from others.
Cynics and most critics
     are cursed with a relentless itch --
A need to convince themselves
     that they are not inferior to others.

They project their fears and inadequacies
     onto whomever they can.
So when they make disparaging remarks,
     it is one self-image chastising another.
Neither one is yours.
     It’s not about you at all.

If someone throws bricks at you,
     do not stoop to throw them back.
Build something with them --
     perhaps a wall around your garden.
Leave an open gate – you want a boundary,
     not a fortress or a prison.

Elitism is a Euphemism

Snobbery is Insecurity all dressed up
     in fancy, musty clothes from a stuffy attic.
False Pride is Shame going the ball --
     but dreading midnight.
Snobs are afraid they’ll be found out
     to be like everyone else, frail and flawed.

Most of their shortcomings matter very little,
     but one crucial virtue is lacking.
Humility – the habit of seeing yourself
     as you truly are, not as you wish to be.
Once you accept the truth,
     there is nothing left to prove.

Part II. SELF-CRITICISM Reprise from April 6, 2010

From CRITICISM: A TRILOGY

The Road To Perfection

The harshest critic is usually the Judge within you
     taking over the task begun by your parents.
Perhaps it’s time to send that judge down the road –
     and to exile the Judge’s soul-mate, the Victim --
that pin-cushion Martyr, with arrows by the hundreds
     sticking into him or her from all angles.

Do you set higher standards for yourself
     than you do for others? Isn’t that Vanity?
Why be so slow to forgive yourself for making errors,
     when you would so quickly forgive a friend?
Do you think you can achieve Perfection?
     If so, you’ve already made one big mistake.

Accept the fact that the Road to Perfection
     has not been completed -- nor will it ever be.
Check all your baggage except for one knapsack,
     then tear up the ticket and travel light.
Let the Judge and Victim trudge toward Perfection,
     while you head toward Fulfillment instead.

Your Garden

Peer into a mirror as if it were a window
     looking out on a garden.
Then step outside into that garden
     and just admire it for a while.
Now you may look around for weeds,
     but go slowly and carefully with the hoe.

Every new sprout is not an evil alien invader
     on a mission to choke your petunias.
Welcome some wildflowers,
     like Spontaneity and at least a little Risk.
Trust Helen Keller -- “Life is a daring adventure or nothing.
     Security is mostly a superstition. ”

Take time often to water your garden,
     but not with a fire hose.
Compassion is a persistent shower,
     but a gentle one --
Enough to wash the dust from the leaves
     and refresh the thirsty roots.

Now go somewhere else
     and do something different.
Come back in the morning light to see how well
     the garden grew during the night --
Simply because you turned it over and left it alone --
     trusting that all would be well. It is.

Part III. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM

From CRITICISM,  A TRILOGY


Criticism Without Condescension

The only criticism of any value
     is Constructive Criticism, kindly offered.
Patronization is a hollow bone,
     useful only as a weapon.
Sincerity is the marrow needed for growth.
     Pick no bones without it.


Whom Do You Trust?

Seek the advice of someone with no agenda
     other than to help you.
Someone trustworthy, truthful and tactful,
     who will say what they truly believe.
Don’t bother if you’re just looking for someone
     to agree with you.

Put your own opinion on a shelf, for now,
     to make room in your head for new ideas.
Listen with an open mind
     and adopt ony the ideas that willl work for you.
The finest new clothes may not come in your size.
     Borrow only those that fit.

Value the opinion of a simple man,
     though he may lack tact or eloquence.
Unencumbered by pride or reputation,
     he often sees more clearly than the experts.
With childlike honesty, he will give you his view,
     and be delighted that you asked for it.


Divine Guidance

Tech support is available from our manufacturer.
     Call him -- anytime, any topic, no cost!
Smarter than Google, though slower than a turtle,
     with answers tailored to your needs.
It’s not necessary to put your question into words,
     or even into complete thoughts.

You won’t be addressed by a voice from the sky –
     unless you’re Charlton Heston.
It will be more like a telepathic message
     from Jiminy Cricket, perhaps when you’re asleep.
Wish upon that star … then wait … patiently ... quietly …
     and the answer will seep into you.

Without your knowing when it happened,
     you’ll realize that you can see more clearly.
When you get this gift that some call Grace,
     do what Mom taught you: say, “Thank You!”.
Somehow, the fog will have faded away –
     and you will know what is right and true.


AFTERWORD -- An Earworm for You to Sing and Share

“Has anybody here --
     seen a judge and a victim?
Can you tell me where they hide?”
     “I thought I saw them trudgin’
Down the road to Perfection,
     with Anger, a Martyr, and Pride.”


LAST WORD

Copyright 2010, V. J. Lucid and The Attention Deficit Compan
      but feel free to forward it to friends.
It’s too big to chew without cutting it up,
      so each part and many verses are written to stand alone.
If you like it,  please tell DrSpeedbump@DrSpeedbump.com
If you don’t like it, you can't image the size of the dust bunny I do not give.

TRUST THE WIND

There's a reason why the Wind brought you here.
Simply being unable to figure out what it is
     has no effect on its fulfillment.  Trust the Wind.

Flowers that go unnoticed will be fruitful.
Blossoms picked will never yield fruit,
     but they, too, have not failed in their duty.

Soak up the Rain and Sun -- Bloom in your own garden.
The Wind will do what it will and, one way or another,
     whether you know it or not, you shall be Fulfilled.